Self-Determined Destruction

In the movie The Great Debaters, a young character quotes Lawrence in an (effective, I might add) effort to make the cut for the high school debate team,

I never saw a wild thing feel sorry for itself.

A wild thing does not self-indulge in pity. Makes sense. I've never watched a cat-and-mouse chase prematurely end with the cat sitting down on it's haunches, snuffing it's nose in the air, and exhausting in cat-tones, "I'm just not fast enough to catch food for myself. It's better to die hungry than look stupid trying." (Now, if you have seen such an event, please comment and I'll revise my statement.)
What is the core root of pity? Is it apathy? hopelessness? embarrassment? fear? I look to the latin, and interestingly, pity is derived from the 13th century pietat, a derivative of pious. The original meaning was admirable, falling on the defining line of charity. It doesn't seem so anymore. Pity, or 'feeling sorry for yourself' is most ardently a pathetic state, one which frequently arouses disgust and only on an exiguous occasion compassion.

A psychology study provides some interesting insight concerning self-pity in humans. The premise suggests that humans, if there exists a strongly probably chance of failure in an action, will employ mechanisms and habits in their personal life that will eradicate with certainty any chance of success in such action.

For example, a case study was performed on a group of individuals who took a math test. After each learned of their score, they were asked to retake the test. Prior to retaking the test, they were allowed the option to consume performance-weakening drugs. Those persons who had done poorly the first taking of the test were more likely to utilize the drugs than those who had done well on the test. Ingesting the drugs was a form of personal success-sabotage. It assured that if failure were repeated, at least there was an excuse for failure: "it was the drug's fault."

I've seen some of this behaviour in my own life. For example, when I felt inadequate in comparison with other players on a sports team, I would purposefully not 'try my hardest.' That way, when I actually was less capable than other team members, it was because I wasn't trying hard, not because my technique wasn't up to par. A similiar situation can be seen during finals week when someone doesn't study for their final, which gives a proper excuse for not passing the class.

Pity could be interpreted as those self-destructive actions which become habit. We may consciously or unconsciously choose the destructive habits as a way to deal with guilt, shame, or inadequacies.


This parallels over to the gospel. Every bishop has heard that the Atonement will "work for someone else, but not for me. I've sinned too greatly," or that "I'm too weak to use the Atonement." These statements are indicative of personal feelings of inadequacy coupled with self-defeating mechanisms. It is easier to assume the Atonement won't work, or that we can't access the Atonement rather than putting forth the effort of using the atonement and failing. The destructive mechanisms are modes of thought that 1. I don't deserve the atonement; 2. If I tried the atonement, I may fail.

This area of self-determined destruction is where I believe pity aligns with piety. It is in recognizing our ubiquitous limitations, yet still relying on the Lord that we become pious. We must cast aside our self-pity, our destructive thinking or habits, our disgusting self-disgust, and confront the naked truth of what we are. We MUST know our inadequacies and STILL put forth effort, even in the face of failure. That, my dear reader, is the true form of pious pity.